I saw this gem today and smirked to myself. As far as I know, vivid is not an adjective you use to describe taste. Or ice cream. So unless I open the lid and am blinded by the vivid whiteness of the vanilla ice cream, I will not be impressed. (It's actually kind of retarded that they would name it vivid vanilla because vivid means colorful and white is most obviously not colorful, and is basically the antonym for the word colorful. Basically the people at that company are either idiots, or immigrants from China or India.).
I know what they were going for. They wanted a fun name that would make an alliteration with the word vanilla.
Below I have compiled a list of names that are all potentially better than Vividly Vanilla.
(Say all these coming up paragraphs in a super excited salesperson voice)
Vivacious vanilla! So lively and packed with mutant radioactive junk called MSG!(major supernatural gunk) it might crawl into your bowl for you! Don't worry about about getting a spoon to eat it, it will automatically jump into your mouth and wallow around in your hot tub of spit and chill out for a while. ..
Also comes in Vaccine vanilla, (Never has drugging your hyper bouncing off the walls children with horse tranquilizer been quite so tasty and mess free!)
Vague Vanilla (never has an ice cream tasted so good on the tip of your tongue (like you vaguely remember? anyways that's where that joke was headed))
Vain Vanilla- Watch out, it might look better than you after you've eaten thirty pounds of it and your muscles turn into marshmallow delight, your blood stream turns into melted moose tracks(our ultimate goal!) and your brain, a cluster of rocky road peanuts and fudge sauce. *addicting qualities are in no ways like the drugs heroin or cocaine ;)
Vampire Vanilla - This makes no sense! But we thought since you like vampires you might like to try this! (Additional charge for unknown veins of red to be added. It might be just food coloring! It might not!)
Vandalizing Vanilla!- That kroger related picture of ice cream on the side of that train car was not caused by us! Rather a supportive fan base!
Vaporizing Vanilla! - Wow! Never has vanilla been so action packed and child-learning based! Learn the basics of chemistry and how to treat chemical burns all at the same time! *vaporizing vanilla will self combust when reacted with the following compounds and elements: oxygen, metal spoon, slobbery tongue, and plastic bowl
Varmit Vanilla! - If you like to taste of vermin and roadkill, boy do we have the product for you, in freezer friendly form! *only available in the south
Vasectomy Vanilla - What a great present for your husband or friend going through a rough time! *hallmark get well from your vasectomy cards are 50 cents off with purchase
Veggie Vanilla - don't tell your kids what our secret ingredient is! (squash!) *also great for vegetarians looking for that extra healthy serving
Velcro Vanilla - we're secretly using that word to advertise for a company paying us to do it! We also have velcro shoe bits and shoe laces added in just for fun!
Ventriloquist Vanilla- where is that voice coming from?
Vendetta Vanilla- Why not?
Vat Vanilla!- okay sorry, I've gone a little overboard, but the truth is, if that stupid name made me do all that, there is basically something wrong with it.
Okay I'm tired so I'm only going to say a little bit about this one. First of all I don't think either extreme or maximum need to be words included in an ice cream title. Like when does ice cream need to be so crazy and insane? second of all, pick one or the other, not both, not right next to each other, and basically whoever this advertiser is, working for this company needs to be drowned in an extreme maximum vat of Vendetta Vanilla! (Why not?).
